For quite some time, Jaden was having some major behavioral meltdowns. With every meltdown or wrong decision, I would sit him on timeout and then follow with a consequence which caused tears most of the time and lots of mommy guilt. I hate being the bad cop. I became discouraged and was feeling really sad. I was sad for whatever the underlying issue is that would cause such negative behavior, sad for Jaden, and the overwhelming feelings of failure came over me. After a chat with a trusted friend, I realized every child will act out their frustration when they don't know how to properly communicate it. It's "normal". Also, I was spending so much time focusing on the negative behavior and overlooking the positive things. After coming to this realization, the fuzzy ball jar began!
It started with an empty jar and each time I have noticed good behavior such as using his manners, cleaning up his toys, being friendly, being helpful.... anything worth rewarding, I put in a fuzzy ball or two. If he has had no time out for that day, he gets a handful. He gets so excited! When the fuzzy balls fill the jar all the way, he gets to pick a fun activity (or reward).
Objective: to encourage positive behavior.
Reward ideas:
* Stay up late
* Computer games
* Go to the zoo
* Buy a new toy
* Go to a movie
* Extra dessert
* Play with friends
* PS3 games
* Fun crafty/artsy activity
etc...etc.. you get the idea.
Since we started this reward system.... Jaden has been much better! He goes on time out once or twice a week! HUGE improvement! There are some weeks he doesn't do any time out. I just wanted to share this with other mommies that may be having some trouble. Don't give up!
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