"NO!" It's liberating.

NO!

Say it with me. Nooooo. No. No thank you. Not today. Doesn't that feel good?

My whole childhood, I was raised to be a 'people pleaser' because of fear. Fear of what people would think, their hurt feelings, or whatever. Later as a teenager/young adult it because so hard for me to say no. Sometimes saying no caused me so much anxiety and unnecessary worry. I went through a time where I went to therapy to help me deal with some things- aka psycho mother. Therapy was good for me. Don't judge me. I learned how to say no. For a long time, I was afraid to but then I practiced. And now, I have no problem. It feels so liberating to say no.

"That doesn't work for me."

"I will pass this time, thank you for thinking of me/us."

"I have plans already." (Even if my plans are sitting in my pajamas!)

This week, I've been awesome at saying no. I'm finding it's really quite fun.

 Lover's mom asked me if she could be in the delivery room.

"Actually we will call you when I'm in labor but we are asking that no one come to the hospital until after we have spent time with our new baby."

Extended family asked me to take some family/group pictures for them.

"I don't do photos professionally anymore, but I will email you some great referrals."

Someone who I'm pissed at is in town this weekend. I don't care to see her. Plus, I don't want to be 'fake nice'. She wanted to get together.

"I'm busy with my family this weekend and helping J with work. I will be exhausted when I get home and ready for bed. I hope you have an enjoyable weekend. IF I get a free moment, I'll let you know."

A sweet friend & I wanted to get some dessert after my Dr's appointment. I let her know I was still in town. Politely, she said "let's plan on another day. I just don't feel well."

It is okay to say no and to be told no. It's not the end of the world. I wish people were more okay with being told no. Isn't it okay that I don't want to see you if I don't feel up to it? I'm going to challenge you to say no. And don't feel the pressure and worry. Don't let your mind wander with uncertainty. They will survive! Put yourself first. It's liberating. The people who really matter, won't mind. ;)